It is a social belief that woman stands behind a man’s success. Well, it is not entirely true. In my case, it was, it is a man in my life who is the reason for my success. Society has always been partial towards men. Society expects men to behave as per the standards. For example, men are expected to work irrespective of their liking it or not. They are not expected to be emotionally vulnerable. They are not expected to be supportive of their wives and their aspirations. If by chance they do, they are honored with various titles from “Kaam chor”, “Biwi ka Gulam” etc. etc.
Things are changing, and it is for good. I was raised in a cocoon, protected, pampered to the core as I was the eldest daughter, and for quite some time only child. My outings were restricted post 6 p.m. Adventures of riding a cycle, traveling alone in a bus were a dream, which stemmed from the concern of “What if I get into trouble or worse.”
While I wanted to be independent, dying to be that butterfly ready to spread wings, I was offered job and master’s program by one of reputed MNC’s. I had to reject it because it was not in the same place where my family stayed. How could I be allowed to go away from the Cocoon! I was meant to be protected. However, I took up a job at another MNC, which was offered with better remuneration; the pro was I got to stay cocooned! Two years passed by, and I had no clue what I was doing with my life. That is when my mother got better of her desire to get me married.
Naïve at the age of 23, I was married to a man who lived overseas. He worked hard in his life to be where he is. At the age of 26, he had an accomplished work profile; he was a sought after bachelor. I don’t know what got better off me; I said yes to him. We spoke at length for hours. Never for once, I felt I was talking to a stranger.
He became an anchor to my wandering ship of ambition. He encouraged me to learn again. Be independent. He brought me out of my Cocoon. Helped me transform into the butterfly I wanted to be. He accompanied me throughout the first year of university. He encouraged me to be financially independent because he realized the value of that even before I did. Weekdays, I was playing roles of IT employee, wife, and homemaker. Over weekends, I was a student, and throughout that phase, he was my driving force.
We had our child over this phase, where I was still learning. Still, he was my constant support to the extent that, at times, I would go mad at him for making me all worked up. It was not easy, being a new mother, out of a job, feeling lost! Still, he bore the brunt! He stayed at home. He did not quit his job and stuck to a job which he did not enjoy anymore, to take care of our child, so I could feel comfortable and confident going out and working.
Now, after three successful years of resuming work (without a break). Having an edge to my resume, which raises eyebrows in surprise, after reaping the fruits of my labor, when I look back, I feel so blessed that I got to be his wife. I am truly thankful for meeting man, who considers my life not so different from his. I still act pricy, goofy, moody, and everything that a pampered girl does. He ignores me where ever he feels I am overdoing it. Holds me when he knows I need it.
We have respect for the work we do and space to do what we are supposed to do. Compromise where it is required. Fight for what is right (and at times for no reason). It’s been skyrocketing seven years of roller coaster ride, with
each trip with him, taking my breath away!
I know I can reach for the sky, for he is the wind beneath the wings I fly.
Yukti is a traveler, avid-reader, city dweller. and a multi-linguist. She is currently learning Spanish and Japanese.
Featured Image Credits: Azra Bhagat. Instagram handle: Daku Designs